


loving her was red.

by RookieBrown



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-28 18:23:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13909644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RookieBrown/pseuds/RookieBrown
Summary: AU where Kara Danvers falls in love with both Lena and Morgana.orVery very loosely based on the "Enchantress" part of Justice League and modifying it out.





	loving her was red.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I'll mention a few things so that you are at par with storyline.  
> Firstly, it picks up from season 3 but only partially - like there will be no Reign or Ruby. And Mike doesnt never ever ever come back.  
> Secondly, whatever knowledge i use here with references to Merlin, they are solely based on what i learnt from fan videos?, i guess.  
> Thirdly, this is me trying to give Morgana the redemption arc she deserved.

 

There was a stranger vibrancy underneath your skin. _An unbundled energy –_ you would protest but J’onn would say _anger – young warm blooded stupid anger and acute bull headedness which –_

“ - which will get you killed one day, Supergirl.” J’onn says sternly, handed folded behind his back.

 

You huff at his _bull-headedness,_ damped fingers curling from the newly placed dent on the steel. Lena at often times had called you – the _Kara “you”_ bullheaded but there had always been a softness to her saying, her eyes warm and head nodding at you, a slight rosy tint on her pale cheeks.

 

Like when you were adamant that you could eat a dozen potstickers and a pizza – _with a double cheese topping._ You had ate it of course despite the tights cramps that had started cooing in your stomach walls. There was _this_ gentle correction in her torn then, not that _I told you so Kara_ Alex would always yell at you – her voice that had always made you squirm before you had apologized to her.

 

The memory was nothing of importance. Just a culmination of small moments but his _“bullheadedness”_ makes you curl your palm tighter before you hit the steel walled again and again but the green halo above you.

 

You were human under the kryptonite aura and the pain came shooting up in warm blood slipping as you hit it the final time.

 

“ _Supergirl – “_ J’onn flinched out to you but you raised out a wobbly hand at him.

 

“Just for a little while, please, J’onn.” You plead sitting under the diminished wave of green.

 

Soot and sirens of crying parents – rushing bells of ambulances – fading heartbeats – the crumble of _Metallo’s_ green synthesized heart in your palm and Lena’s hollow gaze at you as she stepped away – _it rings in your ears._

“Kara.” He calls.

 

You feel awfully weak and tired but somehow you know you won’t be able to sleep.

 

You sit in your red and blue and in tight wetted lips.

 

 

 

You blame it on your iron clad habit. Not perceiving the part of your brain that says _a need to see her._ You leave the DEO and somehow inevitably the wind under your cape carries you to her loft. Still in the heart and yet from the sound and murmur of _National City._

 

Your legs hang off the corner of the concrete building. You watch her stand in the balcony in a hasty knotted robe, bare footed and a glass of bourbon in her left hand. You can see the lengthy cut scarring over her forehead, callously overshadowed by her wet hair – her broken bloodied lips that had not too long ago screamed at you _let me go, save them Supergirl._

 

You clench your bruised knuckles and she gulps the entirely of the strong alcohol in one slip. You hear the erratic thumb of her heart, the hitch in her voice as the glass almost slips as you struggle to run to her.

 

She looks down then too many lone tears fall in gravity.

 

The concrete breaks under your pressure, your vision growing bleary. You watch her wipe her face as she nods at something before she goes inside, momentary pausing at the open balcony doors before closing them shut.

 

You don’t know why it hurts so much. _But Rao it hurts like someone’s twisting a knife slowing into you._ You stay for another hour, drifting to her gentle breathing before flying to your apartment.      

 

_You can’t believe it – you should have known Lena Luthor would always choose the plain old Kara over the “S”._

You wait in an odd bated breath as you for an umpteenth time click the cap of your pen. Everyone member of the department is present except for the singular lonely seat of _Lena._

You watch the minute’s hand round up in your wristwatch. _5 minutes late to be exact._

But Lena was never late.

 

You are frantic as you look up to James. He’s puzzled, a slow furrow of worry shadowing him.

_What if –_

_What if –_

_What if –_ is what you think. It has not even been 24 hours since Metallo had attacked Lena and now _she’s not here -_ you shy down the beating of the nearing hearts and close your eyes and try to follow _her_ heartlines.

 

Nothing on the floor.

 

Nothing in the building.

 

Nothing in past the streets either.

_Nothing in -_

 

The more you panic, the more disarray goes your thoughts. You can’t find you anywhere and a nausea is piling up in your throat. You nearly tear apart your bag for your phone, your finger destabilizing on _Lena_ and her crippling _I need space from you, Supergirl, you owe me that much sanity._

You almost dial her when the office door opens and comes in _Cat Grant._

“Miss Luthor will of course be holding the majority of the stocks but – due to some discrepancies – we both thought it would be the best if I returned as the _CEO -”_ Cat passes, manicured fingers skimming over the leather seat, a stalled look at you before she continued “ – at the very least for the timing being or before I find a _capable enough substitute.”_

She smiles tight as if she’s been sworn to secrecy and sits down. Nobody notices but the pen crumbles to near dust in your hand.

 

 

 

You find her in the DEO.

 

In the testing room. Wearing translucent glasses, a navy blue fitted shirt and an awfully tight pencil shirt that accentuates her soft curves. _That’s_ the first thing you notice as you almost jump up to talk to her, the red cape flowing behind, only to notice that upturn of ruby lips as she speaks to _Alex._

She’s talking – _babbling,_ you know – probably of some scientific article or _Leo Tolstoy,_ her hands would just start jumping with her, flying half hazard in front as she would ramble on. Lena’s adorably passionate but it’s always been with you. It somehow nags you much to your annoyance.

 

You almost turn when Alex notices you.

 

“Kara?”

 

You pause and Lena steels. You look up to her and she glues her eyes anywhere but you.

 

You fist in your emotions, jaw breaking at your tightness.

 

“Yes.” You clear your throat. Alex stands straighter, looking between Lena and you and finally her eyes settles on you. _Sympathy. Too much sympathy._

You look away both the two of them.

 

“You know, Barry, he brought over some mangled up tech from _Earth X_ , possibly some Overgirl related work and wanted us to check them out just to be on the safe side.” You place your hands behind you back. “J’onn wanted you and – “ you eye Lena shortly, her spine inhumanly ramrod “ – uh Miss Luthor to get to that immediately.”

 

 Alex blinks her eyes. Once, _twice_ and a third time. She looks at the two of you, flicking her tongue over her lips and curtly makes her way out of the room. Lena unwordedly follows suit, completely discarding your existence in the room but it’s the havoc of the muscles in her heart that makes you reach for her wrist.

 

You aren’t holding too tight and she doesn’t struggle in your hold either except there’s a sharpness in her eyes as she looks at you.

 

“Supergirl?” She bites you.

 

The name stinks sharded on your steel skin. You overlook it.

 

“Are you okay?” – _even after everything –_ you don’t say. Instead you try your best to be _Kara. Just Kara and not the alien kryptonite but you can’t._

She shoots her wrist free out of your hold, a dormant fire reigning in her embers. “I’m absolutely fine.”  But there’s a slight tremble in the bob of her throat when she _lies_ and you know her too well to let her lie.

 

You move a step closer. Softly yet distantly you say, “You are not.”

 

“You don’t know me, _Supergirl.”_ Lena takes to steps back, grit and angst heavy on her shoulders. “You never knew me.”

 

_She’ll hate you._

_She’ll hate you._

Lillian’s sly smirk is still there, ringing in your ears. You can only nod at Lena. Still a final “I’m so very sorry” whisking out like a final prayer from your lips.

 

Lena doesn’t look back, clicked heels making way towards _Ancient Runes_ room but you know she’s heard you.

 

 

 

You don’t pay heed to Alex’s _just go home and get some rest_ or her disgruntled groan either or her earnest _I’ll talk to Lena._ You just don’t pay any heed to your sister, eyes locked to the nimble fingers as she explores the skin of the metal – the beautiful mesh science and destruction past the Earth bounds and time.

 

There are too many times. _Useless things._ You don’t notice – or rather it doesn’t beam in your radar as something radioactive. But Lena moves like a moth to a flame as she picks up the rusted sword, hands brushing of the years of dust that clings on it.

 

The silver is eminent and slick with a vague symbol on it – printed words of an unknown language crafted on its sword blade.

 

Lena smiles at its brilliance despite its faded edges. You see her move lips, lithe fingers moving over the curved words.

 

“You know the language?” You ask.

 

She nods. A laden smile, small but it burns than a thousand lights for you.

 

“It’s Welsh.” She swiftly turns the sword, both hands holding the heavy blade. Even though she struggles under the weight, you think it suits her. Like a queen with iron in her eyes and blade in hands. “Not many speak it these days. Maybe that’s why I like it.”

 

“What does it say?”

 

Alex says somewhere from her back, her voice echoing in the room.

 

Lena smiles at the sword. She had to give up fencing due to her mother’s chagrin but she had loved it – the unswaggering movement of the backsword, even cutting through the thinness of the air or so she had confessed to you once.  

 

“ _Take me up, cast me away.”_

 

 

 

_She’s standing – eyes bright and wearing a crown of hope. You give her a thumbs up. And then a flick of a finger later, a Supergirl’s  statue is revealed. The applause around you breaks – you catch J’onn’s shocked face and Alex’s sharp intake of breath. And Lena looks up at you and your heart just swells._

 

 

  _“I’m hoping this isn’t the last time we talk, Miss Danvers.”_

_“Who would have thought a Luthor and a Super working together.”_

_“Somebody filled my office with flowers.”_

 

_“I’ll always be here for you.”_

_“Kara Danvers believes in you.”_

_“I’m not worth it. Let me go.”_

 

 

_Lena inaugurates Lex’s old rubble of a factory providing employment to 300 new workers. She’s adorably giddy and you believe happiness suits her the best. Especially under dim lights – shy and beautiful._

_The walk from the restaurant to your apartment isn’t much but somehow you try your best to delay it – eyes stuck vehemently on her._

_You hear it before you can notice it._

_The slow release of barrel of a gun._

_The man’s drunk on years of anger and Lex but his aim is far off from her chest – not even circumfering her pumping heart – but still your hand moves like second nature stand-stilling time and the bullet. You will always remember the way Lena looked then – a wave inexorably touching the shore – so heartbreakingly disappointed and betrayed._

_J’onn erases his memory completely to leave no trace of vengeance. A family lost to a factor bomb planted by Lex Luthor. A good man with forced hands._

_And Lena – she never says a word and your heart arrests by each second. She doesn’t ask how long – now the why or how. She sits on the lone bench underneath her building and you plant yourself beside her._

_“Lena.” You whisper, your hand floating over hers. “Lena. Please, it’s not what you think.”_

_She’ll hate you once she knows._

_She looks up at you then, in soaked mascara ruined eyes. Her one hand shadowing over your salted lips and on the scar above your eye._

_“It’s not what you think. It’s not the reason why I didn’t tell you.”_

_She breathes in more tears and you sigh in a voice soaked with unshed truths._

_“So it’s not because I’m a bloody fucking Luthor?”_

_“No.” You sniffle. “In beginning maybe – but later it wasn’t.” Lena stands up and you reach out for her. “It wasn’t Lena. It wasn’t.”_

_“You are my best friend, Lena. You are a Luthor, but at the end of the day you are so much for to me and I’m sorry, I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry I lied to you. I just – I just couldn’t tell you and lying to you, it killed me everyday.”_

_Lena brizzles at you in red eyes._

_“I let you in. And you didn’t even have the decency to -”_

_She nods walking up inside. You run after her._

_“Go home, Supergirl.”_

_“Lena – “_

_“I need space, Supergirl, You owe me that much sanity at least.”_

_It’s the first time in a long few months that you cry yourself to sleep – a grey memory of Mike settling._

You wake up under the sunlamps, mouth ajar and eyes wide as you take in a mouthful of air.

 

It’s J’onn who greets you.

 

“What happened? Did something happen?” You jump down, steadying your bod. “Where’s Alex and Lena? They are alright?”

 

“Miss Luthor’s recovering. And so is Agent Danvers but both are alright. But saying that, we don’t really know what happened there – except it had something to do with the sword or so Miss Luthor believes.”

 

“It was a bomb or something along the lines?”

 

“No, that’s the thing though. It’s doesn’t appear to be of anything like a mass destruction weapon but rather a plain old era sword but since it’s from Earth X every inch of it will be scrutinized.”

 

You can only nod, Lena’s fleeting words clinging in the air around you.

 

  

**Author's Note:**

> This is all me so any mistakes are my own. My day has gone from bad to worse to worst and I guess to some extent this was my place to run away for a while. So any wild thoughts of yours?


End file.
